A list of every awesome and cringeworthy thing I've done in the past two weeks:
1. Drank 10 bottles of cheap French lager and KO'd it before 10pm
2. Tried to steal a hoover from a flat party and been thrown out
3. Being locked in a toilet by a faulty lock, consequently getting the party shut down
4. Sneaking up on unsuspecting residents and shouting "only me"
5. Walking home from Revolution by propping myself up on the wall
6. Losing £20, to later have it given back
7. Collected 40 phone numbers for the EDL march on the 5th
8. Attempting to boot down the door of the neighbours coz I can
9. Spewing up because of the smell of someone else puking up
10. Dancing to Shimmy Shimmy Ya at 7AM by myself in the communal kitchen
11. Being awake till 9AM and watching the sun rise
12. Picking Will up by my neck when he was plastered
13. Sitting around the kitchen all day, everyday since Wednesday morning
14. Cutting my hand open, so that you can now see muscle and flesh, by hitting it on the floor after play fighting
15. Eating people's left over food they've left when gone to bed
16. Being the go-to-guy when you need directions around Manchester
17. Drinking six White Russians in about 45 minutes and not being sick
18. Falling asleep in a boring lecture
19. Not turning up for seminars coz I'm a tough guy and couldn't be arsed finding the room
20. Seeing Nick Cave and then rushing out because we couldn't afford his new book
21. Eating tinned food and pizzas for two weeks - banquet
22. Smashing my head on the stairs of Joe's building block and then having to have Anna guide me back home
23. Choking Ava coz she had beef
24. Having the girl with glasses who worked at The Imp in my globalisation class...I avoid her
25. Having my arse ripped to shreds by sub-standard toilet paper and having to go into Geoffrey Manton building on my day off (today) to steal some toilet paper
Drink Responsibly
